Wednesday, February 15, 2023

This Book Really Cut Me Up.

See My Review Of. . .

My Heart is a Chainsaw

As followers of my blog will know, I’m absolutely ‘stacked’ when it comes to my read and review list. So much so, that sometimes I don’t have time to scour the internet for fresh ideas. Especially those that will fit my ‘quirky’ preferences. However, THAT’s where Black Gate Fantasy comes in, as the staff there have an eye for spotting things that will appeal to my particular tastes.

Just look at the blurb for My Heart is a Chainsaw:

*************

Jade is one class away from graduating high-school, but that's one class she keeps failing local history. Dragged down by her past, her father and being an outsider, she's composing her epic essay series to save her high-school diploma.

Jade's topic? The unifying theory of slasher films. In her rapidly gentrifying rural lake town, Jade sees the pattern in recent events that only her encyclopedic knowledge of horror cinema could have prepared her for. And with the arrival of the Final Girl, Letha Mondragon, she's convinced an irreversible sequence of events has been set into motion.

As tourists start to go missing, and the tension grows between her community and the celebrity newcomers building their mansions the other side of the Indian Lake, Jade prepares for the killer to rise. She dives deep into the town's history, the tragic deaths than occurred at camp years ago, the missing tourists no one is even sure exist, and the murders starting to happen, searching for the answer.

As the small and peaceful town heads towards catastrophe, it all must come to a head on 4th July, when the town all gathers on the water, where luxury yachts compete with canoes and inflatables, and the final showdown between rich and poor, past and present, townsfolk and celebrities slasher and Final Girl.

*************

So, we have all the ingredients of an absolute gem here.

Jade Daniels is something of a social misfit, both at school and within her local community. Her dad’s a deadbeat drunken bum; her mother’s absent; nobody gives a damn about her. And to top it all off, she walks the proverbial tightrope by retreating into a blood-tinted haven in which 1980’s horror movies color her perspective. But that’s how she copes, by viewing the world about her and all its pressures through a lens of grime and gore.

Weird eh?

Well, it would be, except for the fact that Jade is a walking library when it comes to the horror genre. She knows everything. All the twists and turns. All the feints. All the clichés and tropes. So much so, that when the everyday drudgery of life is suddenly jarred by a number of unexpected deaths, Jade becomes convinced she can see the link. There’s a serial killer on the loose. A killer who is no doubt preparing for a grand, July 4th slasher-fest finale.

The thing is, nobody believes her when she tries to tell them what’s coming. So how the hell will she convince the authorities that they have to do something?

Well, as I found out, this is a story of two halves. Or more accurately, a story of 99.5% Awesome and 0.5% What the hell?

Let me explain. . .

Jones’ knowledge of the horror genre is encyclopedic, giving his main character an undeniable depth that makes you just want to dive in and help her. Yes, Jade’s a rebel. She’s an oddball who deliberately tests the boundaries of what’s acceptable. But she also has a heart of gold. She wants to help an unwilling and undeserving community from a fate worthy of the most horrendous bloodbath imaginable, and she goes out of her way to do just that. In doing so, she digs herself an ever deepening hole in which her reputation will remain forever buried.

But she doesn’t care. She wants to do the right thing. . .
And nobody believes her, setting in motion a chainsaw of events that are as morbidly hypnotic as they are inevitable and compelling. Jones sprinkles clues throughout his narrative that point toward an apocalyptic climax. And you can literally feel the tension building as we inevitably head toward that climax, until . . . BAM! The story leaves you floundering.

And not in a good way.

As I mentioned above, 99.5 % of the story is a 5-star blitz of excellence. A blitz that suddenly fizzles to a puff of elusive smoke in the last pages that – how can I say this – takes all the wind out of your sails, and all the pzazz out of the fabric of the story.

In fact, I had to re-read the last chapter in its entirety three times. Yes, THREE times, just to make sure I hadn’t missed something vital in my haste to witness the grand finale.

You’ll see what I mean if you read this story for yourself.

All that work. All that depth and creativity. All those breadcrumbs and slow, pressure cooker buildup for . . . THAT? There was certainly nothing grand about it. And as for a finale? I’m sorry, I’m still waiting.

I note with interest how many other reviewers thought the book was brilliant. And to be fair, it is. Except for the ending, which I felt was a horror story in itself. A shame, as this could easily been one of the best books I’ve read and reviewed in a long time.

Amazon Review

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A Hybrid's Tale

Born a Cambion – a half-demon, half-human hybrid – and cursed by a terrible hunger he can barely control, Augustus Thorne spends his long and lonely life hunting and exterminating any Incubi and Succubae he can find. But no matter how many he destroys, he can always make room for one more. Especially if it’s the foul scum who raped his mother; Augustus’ own spawn-father, Fanon. Guided by his mother’s diaries, Augustus pursues Fanon down through the centuries and around the world, until fate seems to point him toward his heart’s desire. Yet, things are not as they appear, and the revelations Augustus uncovers are mind boggling. For if he wishes to face his father, he must first learn more about his own unique heritage, and the awful circumstances that led to his creation. The trouble is, doing so might just cost him his humanity.

Call of the Cambion

Cursed to live his life as a Cambion – a half-demon, half-human hybrid – Augustus Thorne has spent centuries hunting the creature responsible for his existence. His own spawn-father, Fanon. Along the way, Augustus has built something of a reputation as a demon slayer. However, his reputation proves to be a two-edged sword, for while it keeps him safe, it prevents Augustus from forming a relationship. Something he yearns for with all his heart. Neither does it protect him from the wrath of the demondim, who view his activities as a threat. In an effort to overcome these obstacles, Augustus finds it necessary to confront the darker aspects of his Cambion nature. Something, it seems, he must embrace fully. Only then will he be free to make his own choices, and in a position to end his father once and for all. Alas, such a path results in dire consequences.

The Siren's Song

Having survived the double-cross planned by Asmodai, the demon king, and Fanon, his own spawn-father, Augustus Thorne is trying to come to terms with his lot in life. Both Fanon and Agamemnon, the king’s assassin, are dead. As are the embers of a burgeoning relationship. The only woman Augustus has ever dared to love has fled, driven from his side in fear of the danger being with him brings. Unfortunately, he can’t dwell of what might have been. An insidious new threat has emerged, one that exposes humanity to unimaginable peril. Yet fate seems to lend a helping hand when Augustus stumbles upon a mysterious woman, someone who appears to be the only other Cambion he’s ever met. It’s only after they team up to fight the rising tide of terror together that things get complicated.

Web of the Succubus

Augustus Thorne has his work cut out, trying to juggle his recuperating capabilities with a turbulent personal and professional life. On the plus side, things have improved dramatically with Colleen Wolf. But, as he endeavors to cement his relationship with her, events conspire against him. It transpires there are elements within some of the most powerful human governments who are secretly collaborating with the demon court. Their goal being to turn the majority of mankind into chattel. Brood livestock, whose only purpose is to serve the demondim’s ghastly appetites. Augustus simply can’t allow that to happen. He sets out to frustrate Asmodai’s machinations, unaware that a spider is waiting in the dark. And it’s ready to pounce.

A Crown in Peril

Devastated by the loss of Colleen and enraged by the treacherous cunning of the demon king, Augustus Thorn decides that he’s suffered enough. Embracing the full might of his Cambion Nature, he takes the fight deep into the heart of demondim territory, wreaking terrible destruction on all who cross his path. Gaining access to forbidden archives, he uncovers ancient texts, hinting at the mantle he must assume to bring the reign of the demon king to an end. However, Asmodai hasn’t been idle. Learning from his mistakes, he also seeks hidden knowledge, and goes all out to consolidate his position. And the knowledge he uncovers just might contain the vital clue he needs to end the Cambion threat once and for all. It’s a race against time . . . and there can only be one winner.

Rise of the Despoiler

Augustus Thorne is evolving. Into what, he doesn’t quite understand. Yet! All he does know is that his destiny is somehow linked to that of the Despoiler. A champion that prophesy claims will bring the demon king to his knees, undoing all the harm inflicted upon the three realms since the Fallen came to Earth. But to ensure such a destiny, Augustus must walk into uncharted territory. Wield stygian forces, the likes of which have never been witnessed before. Court death, as if was his intimate lover. Most disconcerting of all, he must put his personal vendetta aside, and submit to the greater good. Only then will he become the foretold hero, ending tyranny’s reign forever.

Skinwalker - Genesis

As one of only seven soldiers to survive the grueling, six-month long, UK Special Forces selection process, Captain Callum MacDonald has earned the right to be counted a member of the killer elite. Alas, all thoughts of celebration are forgotten when one of his fellow candidates disappears in an area of the Amazonian rainforest regarded as cursed by local indigenous tribes. A rescue mission is quickly mounted. However, it’s not until the heavily armed group of hardened commandos reenters the jungle and find themselves being hunted, that it slowly dawns on them. They might not be the apex predators they thought they were. After all, how can you expect to overcome something that refuses to stay dead?

Skinwalker - Exodus

Callum MacDonald’s hope of becoming a fully fledged member of the UK Special Forces died on the day he became a skinwalker – A legendary creature capable of assuming the form and nature of any animal they desire. Many would look on such a metamorphosis as a dream come true. Not so Callum MacDonald, who now views his existence as a nightmare, one in which he must consider every step he takes. And the reason? There are those who would exploit his gifts should they ever learn of his existence. And with a mounting tally of dead bodies surrounding his every move, that likelihood becomes more of a reality with each passing day.

Skinwalker - Apocalypse

Ever since the authorities discovered the existence of the skinwalker clan to which Callum MacDonald now belongs, their evolution has continued apace. Far from being exploited, they are coveted for their skills, and encouraged to use their abilities for a greater good. And not before time. A growing peril threatens the safety of decent folk living throughout the whole of the North American continent. One that was allowed to gain a foothold, long, long ago, because of mankind’s own fears, prejudice and shortsightedness. As such, the risk was ignored, allowing it to fester and grow. So much so, that now, centuries later, even the power of the fabled skinwalkers might not now be enough to thwart it.

Sinister Stories

A new wife treasures her Tuesday morning coffee with the ghost of her husband’s first wife—until she doesn’t. A man responds to his friend’s text and meets him at a very strange bar for happy hour; they soon find there’s nothing happy about the place, and they’re going to be there for a sight more than an hour. A young woman finds herself under spiritual attack from a powerful witch who wants nothing less than the very skin she inhabits. A once-drug-addicted mother struggles mightily to exorcise the demon possessing her six-year-old son, all to no avail. This new collection of horror stories from some of Raven Tale Publishing’s top horror authors explores from every possible angle the things that scare us. Enjoy these eleven tales however you see fit—one per day or all at once . . .

Trouble on the Smoky Hill Trail

A Cheyenne raiding party turns the quiet community of Elder Grove, Kansas, upside down, resulting in the death of a mother and father, and the abduction of their teenage daughters. All seems lost. But the Cheyenne didn’t reckon on the leaders of Elder Grove, Jacob and Noah Pearl. Two men with a remarkable shared history, who are a force of nature when roused. And as the Cheyenne are about to discover, they’re also the kind of men who will do anything to see justice done, even if it means getting their hands dirty.

Shootout at Russell Springs

A tornado tears through the open plains of Kansas, leaving death and destruction in its wake. Yet that force of nature isn’t the only thing that might ravage the land. The Plains Indians are massing in their hundreds. Cheyenne, Comanche, Lakota, Kiowa, and Arapaho. All of them, turning their eyes toward the foreign settlers who encroach ever further into their ancestral hunting grounds with each and every passing year. Already on the run from the law, the notorious Reno Gang also come calling, thinking that the residents of Elder Grove will be no match for a bunch of murdering horse thieves. And just who are the two strangers from the east that come to town, acting all friendly, yet asking sly question about the Pearl brothers? One thing’s for sure. . . Another storm is brewing. And when it strikes, not everyone will walk away.

Uprising in Comanche Country

It took the Pearl brothers considerable time and effort to shape the region around Elder Grove into a safe haven for all. For settlers. For travelers. Even for the Plains Indians who constantly roam the prairie in pursuit of buffalo. But when a bunch of marauding army deserters commits a heinous act that rouses the massed tribes to anger, it puts all that hard work in jeopardy. Yes, the hornet’s nest has been stirred. So much so, that even the Comanche are provoked to war. And their sting is deadly indeed. How the Pearl brothers will react remains to be seen. But one thing’s for sure. Nobody will escape unscathed.

Living By The Code

The old west can be a harsh and unforgiving place, even for those like Jacob and Noah Pearl, who are used to the rigors of frontier living. So, when ghosts from the past return to threaten the peace and stability of their community, they’re quick to respond, and go out of their way to eradicate that threat before the shadow it casts can spread too far. Some might view their response as an overreaction. Ruthless, even. But the Pearl Brothers and the residents of Elder Grove look on it as following the Code of the West. A code that never wavers in the protection of you, your own, and seeing justice done.

Unfinished Business

The Pearl brothers encountered all sorts of people in the years it took them to set up the community of Elder Grove. Disgruntled Plains Indians. Murderers. Horse thieves. Army deserters. And in all that time, none were more exasperating than those folks who acted like a dog with a bone. Those mavericks who let their past failures and grievances gnaw away at them so much that they never seemed able to let go. A troublesome enough irritation when you have to deal with such behavior in passing. Imagine, then, how they’ll respond upon encountering a notorious gang who can’t abide the thought of simply giving up and moving on until they’ve carried out ‘just one more’ robbery. Or worse still, predatory bands of Cheyenne, stubbornly seeking revenge on those they feel have caused them to lose face. Yes, life is never dull on the Plains of Kansas . . . As the Pearl brothers are about to discover yet again.

Call of Duty

The long-awaited day has arrived! Yes, it’s been some time coming, what with all the trials and tribulations they’ve had to overcome. But at last, the day of the wedding is here, and Jacob and Astrid are finally going to tie the knot and settle down. . . Or are they? You see, that’s the thing about Kansas. It’s a vast and majestic country, filled with natural wonders and delights to satisfy the soul and take the breath away. Yet it’s also filled with dangers enough to catch the unwary and send them to an early grave. And when one of those dangers insists on poking its nose into the Pearl brothers’ affairs, now, of all times? Well, it’s time for someone to step up and answer the call of duty.

The IX

The IX, an epic novel spanning past, present, and future:
The ultimatum:
Fight or die.
Roman legionnaires, far from home, lost in the mists of Caledonia; a US cavalry company on a special mission for Presidential candidate Abraham Lincoln; and a Special Forces unit from the 21st century, desperate to prevent nuclear catastrophe:
Snatched away from Earth at the moment of death to a failing planet far away, these misfit soldiers must unite against a relentless foe, where the cost of victory may be more than they're willing to pay. How far will they go to stay alive?
From Perseid Press.

Exordium of Tears

Fight or die.
That simple yet brutal reality is the tenet by which the refugees from Earth – including the fabled lost 9th Legion of Rome; the 5th Company, 2nd Mounted Cavalry Unit; and the Special Forces Anti-Terrorist Team – were forced to live by while the Horde menace existed. Believing that the threat is over, the
survivors now yearn to settle down, start families, and reclaim the lives stolen from them.
But such aspirations might remain beyond their reach, for a shadow looms on the rose-tinted horizon of new beginnings.
The release of the re-genesis matrix has done much to foster a restoration of exuberance across Arden. Along with a resurgence in floral and faunal diversity comes the results of splicing the Ardenese and human genomes: transmutation. A
metamorphosis of stunning magnitude that not only affects the living, but those still is stasis as well.
Recognizing the emergence of a new hybrid species, the Architect – the arcane AI construct tasked with the preservation of the Ardenese race – responds by unlocking
previously hidden and inaccessible areas of the city. It also releases an archive of sealed state secrets. Such revelations are eagerly perused, whereupon a shocking discovery is made.
Prior to the fall, it was common knowledge amongst the Senatum (the highest levels of Arden’s government) that not all the rabid Horde had joined in the rampage across the stars toward Arden.
Realizing that the peril still exists, the newly reformed administration elects to respond in earnest. Existing resources are utilized, suitable candidates are chosen, and a flotilla of ships is sent out to secure, quarantine, and reclaim the outer colonies. A mammoth and hazardous undertaking. And nowhere more so than at the planet from where the outbreak was known to have originated – Exordium – for there, the ancient Horde are not only supremely evolved and highly organized, but are capable of a level of lethal sophistication, the likes of which has never been witnessed before.
It is into this kiln of incendiary potential that the cream of Arden’s fighting forces is deployed.
Worlds are torn asunder, suns destroyed, and star systems obliterated. Yes, tragedy is forged, in a universe spanning conflict which proves once again that…

Death is onlythe beginning of the adventure.

Prelude to Sorrow

The task force dispatched from Arden to eradicate the Horde menace failed, and for those few left alive, the tenet by which they have survived for so long resounds as never before.

Fight or Die!

Now marooned, out of time and out of place, the survivors lick their wounds and struggle to recover while the Horde gather their strength for a final strike that will change the course of history forever. The fate of the galaxy – and more – hangs in the balance.

But fate, it seems, isn’t done with the Ninth, and our heroes find themselves forced to mount a last-ditch attempt to end the threat once and for all.

Will the darkness be vanquished, or will our heroes’ efforts finally signal the beginning of the end of their adventure?

IX Genesis

Arden, birthplace of a people who have mastered the secrets of arcane, reality-bending technology, and home to a civilization that now spans more than thirty planets throughout an entire quadrant of the galaxy. They are wise and understanding. Majestic in vision. Powerful beyond compare. And intent on extending their benevolent influence throughout the stars. . . Until the fateful day their thirst for knowledge leads them to push too far, too quickly. In doing so, they open a door into the antiverse, a realm where the very nature of existence is an anathema to life. An antithesis to all that is good. Evil. And that evil is sentient, as highly contagious as it is fueled by an irresistible proclivity to feed and multiply and spread. And feed and multiply it does. Faced with an overwhelming flood, the Ardenese have no option. They must fight or die!

Hell Bound

In hell, none of the condemned believes they deserve to be there. And that’s fine, so long as they’re not foolish enough to try and do anything about it. For those that do, there’s always Satan’s Reaper–and chief bounty hunter–Daemon Grim.
Feared throughout the many layers of the underverse, no one in their right mind dares to cross him.
However, when Grim discovers that someone has attempted to evade injustice, and seems hell-bent on gaining access to ancient angelic artifacts proscribed since the time of the original rebellion in heaven, circumstances point to the fact they may be doing just that.
The question is...why?
Thus begins an investigation that leads Grim throughout the many contradictory and baffling levels of the underworld, where he unearths a conspiracy that is not only eating its way like a cancer through the highest echelons of Hellion society,
but one which threatens the very stability of Satan’s rule.

As you can imagine, Grim’s response is bloody, brutal, and despicably wicked.

Hell Bound – In hell, everyone can hear you scream...

Hell Hounds

Feared throughout the many circles of the underworld, Satan’s Reaper – and chief bounty hunter – Daemon Grim, is known as a true force to be reckoned with.

Having eliminated a major player in the uprising eating its way like a cancer through the underbelly of hell, Grim is stunned to discover he cannot afford to rest on his laurels, for the rebellion runs far deeper than was ever imagined. New players have emerged – denizens with uncanny abilities – who seem determined to support Chopin and Tesla’s revolutionary agenda.

Ever keen to test their mettle, the Sibitti – personified weapons of the ancient Babylonian plague god, Erra – also appear eager to capitalize on the growing unrest, and set about maneuvering events in order to place themselves in direct opposition to Grim’s investigation.

And if that was not cause for concern enough, there’s an insane angel on the loose, a creature as hell-bent on creating havoc as he is to return home.

How do Grim and his rabid pack of bounty hunters respond?

Baying for blood – doesn’t even begin to describe it.

Hell Gate

The Angel Grislington is dead, effaced from existence during an epic battle with Daemon Grim that destroyed a Zion forged blade and one of Satan’s premier palaces in the process.

Chopin and Tesla have gone to ground. So much so, that they might as well be six feet under helping to push up hell-daisies.

Even Erra and the Sibitti, his living weapons of vengeance and destruction, seem reticent to show their faces.

Rioting sweeps the length and breadth of the underworld. Yet the halls of the Mortuary lie vacant, for someone is stealing soul-essence, the very means by which Satan condemns sinners to everlasting torment.

But who would dare such a thing? And how does the hush that descends upon the dirty streets of latterday hell tie into ancient prophecy relating to the Reaper’s destiny?

It’s often calmest before the storm.

Just imagine how bad things will get with the apocalypse approaching.